Page 7 of 7
Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 2:46 pm
by Govs93
QUICK! Everybody down to
Bloomington!
Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 3:13 pm
by Can't Never Tried
"The driver was reporteldy
trapped inside the semi for a short time. He was not seriously injured."
Yeah! Right

Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 3:19 pm
by Govs93
Can't Never Tried wrote:
"The driver was reporteldy
trapped inside the semi for a short time. He was not seriously injured."
Yeah! Right

If I had a nickle for every time I told Mrs. Govs that I was trapped with a bunch of beer....
Posted: Mon Jul 21, 2008 3:21 pm
by Can't Never Tried
Govs93 wrote:Can't Never Tried wrote:
"The driver was reporteldy
trapped inside the semi for a short time. He was not seriously injured."
Yeah! Right

If I had a nickle for every time I told Mrs. Govs that I was trapped with a bunch of beer....
Duh! you'd just go get trapped again.......... geez's Govs

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 12:30 pm
by Can't Never Tried
http://www.startribune.com/local/25757944.html
Just think if this would have happened yesterday we'd have our own Honey Wiess

Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2008 1:47 pm
by tomASS
The bee accident was a lot more dangerous than first realized.
Because they were...............................KILLER BEES!

Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 3:16 pm
by Govs93
Great news for all of you old farts.
Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 7:46 pm
by Can't Never Tried
It wasn't good then! it won't be any better now!

Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 6:35 pm
by Govs93
Here's another reason to be a proud Minnesotan!
Drink is the curse of the land. It makes you fight with your neighbor. It makes you shoot at your landlord and it makes you miss him.
Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 7:00 am
by mainefan
A handful of 7 year old children were asked 'What they thought of beer'. Some interesting responses, but the last one is especially touching.
'I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer he drinks the prettier my mom gets.'
--Tim, 7 years old
'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we want on television when he is asleep, so beer is nice. '
--Mellanie, 7 years old
'My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn't think this is very funny.'
--Grady, 7 years old
''My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and the more they drink the more they give kisses to each other, which is a good thing.'
--Toby, 7 years old
'My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He also wets his pants sometimes, so he shouldn't have too much.
--Sarah, 7 years old
'My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, t he better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.'
--Lilly, 7 years old
'I don't like beer very much. Every time Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they taste disgusting.'
--Ethan, 7 years old
'I give Dad's beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.'
--Shirley, 7 years old
'My Mom drinks beer and she says silly things and picks on my father. Whenever she drinks beer she yells at Dad and tells him to go bury his bone down the street again, but that doesn't make any sense.'
--Jack, 7 years old
Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 6:21 pm
by mainefan
How Beer works- young(drinking age of course) men this is for you!
http://mithuro.com/presscuefiles/januar ... goggle.swf
Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 11:10 pm
by tomASS
mainefan wrote:
'My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn't think this is very funny.'
--Grady, 7 years old
Dmom, your kid says the cutest things!

Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 3:13 pm
by tomASS
If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle. It's called the 401-Keg.
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Makes You Proud To Be An American doesn't it!
Posted: Sat Oct 04, 2008 4:51 pm
by Bash Brother
tomASS wrote:If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle. It's called the 401-Keg.
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Makes You Proud To Be An American doesn't it!
That
SHOULD win the ESPY for post of the year
Posted: Sat Oct 04, 2008 9:34 pm
by tomASS
Bash Brother wrote:tomASS wrote:If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214.00 cash.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle. It's called the 401-Keg.
A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Makes You Proud To Be An American doesn't it!
That
SHOULD win the ESPY for post of the year
For that....I'M THINKING OF INVESTING 4 FOLD. LET IT POUR BABY!

Posted: Sun Oct 05, 2008 10:17 am
by tomASS
A collection of great quotes about beer and why we love it:
Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, "It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
-- Babe Ruth
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
-- Ernest Hemingway
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
-- Paul Hornung
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not.
-- H.L. Mencken
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
-- George Bernard Shaw
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
-- Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
-- Dave Barry
Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 b.c.
-- W.C. Fields
Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
-- Professor Irwin Corey
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group." Salvation in a can!
-- Leo Durocher
One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm. "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
Posted: Sun Oct 05, 2008 7:53 pm
by Bash Brother
tomASS wrote:A collection of great quotes about beer and why we love it:
Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. I think, "It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
-- Babe Ruth
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
-- Ernest Hemingway
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
-- Paul Hornung
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not.
-- H.L. Mencken
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
-- George Bernard Shaw
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
-- Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
-- Dave Barry
Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 b.c.
-- W.C. Fields
Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
-- Professor Irwin Corey
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group." Salvation in a can!
-- Leo Durocher
One night at Cheers, Cliff Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm. "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
On second thought this one might take the ESPY
The importance of Beer
Posted: Mon Oct 20, 2008 5:35 pm
by TTpuckster
You may have all seen this, but it does outlay some important facts, and of course, ultimately, the importance of beer!!!
The Mayonnaise Jar and
2 Beers
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front Of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between The golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous ' yes.'
The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else---the small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.' The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.'

Posted: Mon Oct 20, 2008 9:43 pm
by Cornbread
Crown & Coke
Posted: Thu Dec 04, 2008 2:56 am
by hockeyhair15

wow tomASS wow
i am speechless
Posted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 10:28 pm
by BarTender3035
Budweiser
Posted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 10:38 pm
by Lucia4President
I've always been a Miller guy.
Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:37 am
by EREmpireStrikesBack
Lucia4President wrote:I've always been a Miller guy.
Explains a lot.

Posted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 11:34 pm
by Lucia4President
EREmpireStrikesBack wrote:Lucia4President wrote:I've always been a Miller guy.
Explains a lot.

You're not the first person to tell me that.

Posted: Tue Feb 10, 2009 12:25 pm
by southernmnscout
I have to go with Molson Canadian!