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Good Luck to the Kids!

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:34 am
by Lily Braden
Try-outs are starting and during the next couple of weeks, our kids will find out where they'll be playing for the season. They'll probably be meeting new teammates, maybe be playing for a different coach, facing new challenges.

For a kid, the upcoming season is like a new sheet of ice....clean, smooth and calling their names. Right now, in their minds, it's all good and anything is possible.

Last year, the board got kind of ugly after try-outs. And in my association, that ugliness trickled down to the rink, which was kind of sad.

So this year, let's remember it's about the kids. Tryouts are hard enough without us grownups acting like a bunch of two-year olds. In the next few weeks, some kids are going to be ecstatic and some may be heartbroken. But they ALL get to play hockey, which for 99-percent of them is the goal.

Be there for them.

:D

Re: Good Luck to the Kids!

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:41 am
by tomASS
Lily Braden wrote:Try-outs are starting and during the next couple of weeks, our kids will find out where they'll be playing for the season. They'll probably be meeting new teammates, maybe be playing for a different coach, facing new challenges.

For a kid, the upcoming season is like a new sheet of ice....clean, smooth and calling their names. Right now, in their minds, it's all good and anything is possible.

Last year, the board got kind of ugly after try-outs. And in my association, that ugliness trickled down to the rink, which was kind of sad.

So this year, let's remember it's about the kids. Tryouts are hard enough without us grownups acting like a bunch of two-year olds. In the next few weeks, some kids are going to be ecstatic and some may be heartbroken. But they ALL get to play hockey, which for 99-percent of them is the goal.

Be there for them.

:D
Nicely stated

Be there for them by not being there.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 11:45 am
by SuperStar
TomAss - I wasn't sure if your reply was meant to be funny - But I thought it was great - You are total right - parents - Stay away.. 8)

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 1:33 pm
by hiptzech
tomASS,

Are you ready? This board is going to be on fire over the next couple of weeks. Have you dusted off all of your one liners, can create some new ones. I have been conducting my own skill development, watch classics like The Honeymooners, All in the Family, The Jeffersons, and some new ones like In Living Color, and BET's Comic View.

Best of luck to all of the players.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 2:57 pm
by Nobodyonya
TomAss....I understand your comment on "by not being there" because of the fact some of the parents get too involved, but on the other hand the parents should be there in support of there child. Is there going to be politics during tryouts? You are fooling yourself if you don't think so. So parents take a back seat and enjoy watching your child tryout. My son knows about politics during tryouts. He understands its out there, but he doesn't let it bother him. It happened to him during baseball tryouts this year. He was placed on the "B" traveling team rather than the "A" team. He had the best time of his life, he had more playing time, it was a confidence builder, plus may I add the Coach was better than the "A" Coach. At the end of the season the "A" Coach admitted he should of played on his team, but my son was happier on the "B" team. So parents whatever team your child lands on A, B or C it's in your best interest to support them as I would highly doubt it that your child didn't give 100%. I have 3 children playing hockey and I try to attend each one of there practices/games when I can and yes I will leave early from 1 game just to catch another childs game. Nothing more puts a smile on my face when I am driving home from a practice/game when my child asks me "Dad did you see the play I made"? In your mind it may be small, but to them it is important. Good Luck to all the players

Re: Good Luck to the Kids!

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 5:35 pm
by Indians forever
Lily Braden wrote:Try-outs are starting and during the next couple of weeks, our kids will find out where they'll be playing for the season. They'll probably be meeting new teammates, maybe be playing for a different coach, facing new challenges.

For a kid, the upcoming season is like a new sheet of ice....clean, smooth and calling their names. Right now, in their minds, it's all good and anything is possible.

Last year, the board got kind of ugly after try-outs. And in my association, that ugliness trickled down to the rink, which was kind of sad.

So this year, let's remember it's about the kids. Tryouts are hard enough without us grownups acting like a bunch of two-year olds. In the next few weeks, some kids are going to be ecstatic and some may be heartbroken. But they ALL get to play hockey, which for 99-percent of them is the goal.

Be there for them.

:D
Well said Lily, people need to remember that it is for the kids not the parents.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 5:40 pm
by punchinbag
It is that time of year, when the snow it doth fall.
When skate laces are tied, and the kids have a ball.
Building snowmen and forts, is what it's all about,
Enjoying God's frozen creation, day in and day out.

At the rink we can hear, the joyful sounds of the game.
Mom yelling "Good Job Johnny!", and Dad doing the same.
The image is soothing, full of wintery bliss.
When all of a sudden, something’s amiss.

The ref made a bad call, and poor Johnny's to blame.
Oh how will his parent's, enjoy the rest of the game.
"That's bull!" yells Mom, her fists clenched in a rage.
"Get some glasses!" yells Dad, not acting his age.

Then another get's involved, in this terrible tustle.
And another start's to yell, "You'd better hustle!".
Right before our eyes, the transformation begins.
When the players' parents, turn into goblins.

They are mean and vile, and don't give a damn.
About anything else other, than their little man.
Their friends are now their enemies, oh what a shame.
What a scrambled up mess, they have made of the game.

It is supposed to be for us, a time of joy and pride.
Watching our kids have fun, and taggin’ along for the ride.
Building snowmen and forts, is where it all should begin.
Enjoying God's frozen creation, day out and day in.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 6:15 pm
by gt331
Awesome post punchinbag!

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 2:28 am
by DuckDuckQuackQuack
The parents being banned from watching tryouts routine :roll:

Nothing like paying $1,200 not to watch the kids tryout. As far as I'm concerned as long as the evaluators are doing their job the right way there shouldn't be any controversy. Mix in the multiple tryout dates and the best skaters will prevail. Not sure why parents are not allowed to watch tryouts? I'm sure there's a logical reason :?:

People- This is community based hockey. The associations are run by parent volunteers. No need to get on the high horse. Face it! You signed up to volunteer for..............
A) Love of the game or B) To make sure your kids are on the "A" teams or receive special treatment.
As a former coach I'm hoping that most people will pick # 1 but we all know the sad truth that there are tons of politics in youth sports in general. So sad not to mention REALLY pathetic.

For all you good old boys or hockey know it alls. Why not try to fix the politics first before worrying about the parents and pointing fingers? :wink: I guess that would make too much sense. :oops:

Seriously, why ban parents from tryouts? With or without the parents at the tryouts there WILL be controversy. We all know it as human nature. Sad truth is parents most likely do have a legitimate complaint. It's up to the board members (aka: parents) to take care of the complaints in a professional manner.

Just a thought.

psssssssss. Before I get replies I want to add that I do appreciate anyone who volunteers to help their community. =D>

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 1:07 pm
by Doglover
I was truly enjoying this thread until the last post...

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 2:58 pm
by DuckDuckQuackQuack
Doglover wrote:I was truly enjoying this thread until the last post...
Truth does hurt, doesn't it? :wink:

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 3:19 pm
by cclavin
Remember, 'politics' is just a euphemism for 'my kid didn't make the A team'. ;)

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 11:51 pm
by tomASS
Hiptzech - I'm tuning up too, check out Corner Gas for some great one liner's eh?

I did not say anything about banning parents in this topic - my suggestion was the best thing the parents can do is let there kid tryout on their own. There is nothing a parent can do to help little Wayne or Mario once they hit the ice.

How many of you parents pull up a desk each day in school especially during testing day?

I'm sure all of you will want to attend your kid's first job interview or performance review when they're a tad bit older.

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 9:07 am
by Doglover
Tomass - maybe only the private school parents show up on test days at school since according to Quacker's logic - they paid for the privilege??

Parents - make sure they get lots of rest and are well nourished and hydrated. Then drop them at the rink (plenty early with all their gear) and when you pick them up after tryouts - ask them if they are hungry and what they'd like for dinner.

It's only a game.

Good luck to everyone at tryouts.

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 10:05 am
by 5thgraders
Doglover you don't get it this is not a math test this is hockey you drop
your kid off and leave to the bookstore wow. This is hockey it is played
at a high pace with full physical contact where kids get hurt that is the
facts. Head first into the boards when tripped by your son because he
got beat says it all as to why you wish to not see. Associations do not
even have a Emt at the tryouts think about that. I will be at the tryouts
to see the safety of my child. :-k All top quality teams and tournaments
make sure that a trainer or Emt =emergency medical technician is in the
rink this should be rule # 1 that Mn hockey should adress. Tier 1 has its
own personal traveling trainer at least the good ones do because they
care for the safety of the kids. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:53 am
by punchinbag
I find it absolutely hilarious that the comments on this thread are heading in the direction they are. Truly, we as parents, need to lace up the skates, and re-live the dream we are pushing on our kids or just shut up.

As I write this, I can only think how fortunate I have been to have had the opportunity to be involved in my kids sports all of these years. Those memories will be with us forever. Lucky are those who are able to enjoy this privilege. It is after all, most definitely, a privilege.

Just because we fork out dollars does not give us the right to dictate. If you want to dictate in youth sports, there is only one solution...get involved. In our association it is the same as many. 10% do the work, 80% sit on their behinds, and 10% cause all the problems. We will never get rid of the last 10%, but it would be nice to get the first 10% increased. It is truly for and about the kids.

I am not trying to be pompous or arrogant, I am just fortunate to understand because that is the way I was taught. By none other than, my parents.

Like they say at the buffet line...Kids Eat Free!

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:05 pm
by muckandgrind
Banning parents from watching tryouts is a joke. Everything should be transparent, and nothing should be done in secrecy.

I'm also getting kind of tired of everything bringing up the stereotypical "hockey parent" generalization. Sure, there are overzealous parents in every group. But there has also been dirty things done behind the scenes. I personally know of a situation where kids (not mine) have been screwed over in tryouts because the parents didn't happen to be coaches. (Don't get me started about "parent coaches") Because the association didn't have the foresight to hire a non-parent coach at the "A" level, they had to move a player up from a lower level so they could get their dad to coach, and in the process they moved a player off the "A" team to a lower team to make room for the coach's kid. This wasn't a rumor, I heard this directly from one of the evaluators, who was not happy about it. Needless to say, the coordinator responsible for this was voted out at the next election. If the parents would have been banned from watching, nodoby would have noticed and this type of stuff would have been allowed to continue.

If this IS "truly about the kids" as most of us believe, than we need to take out the veil of secrecy and open things up.

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:39 pm
by netminder.net
muckandgrind wrote;
If the parents would have been banned from watching, nodoby would have noticed and this type of stuff would have been allowed to continue.
If this is really the way it happened, I would be surprised. It seems as though this information would have come out after tryouts, probably with the same repercussions. The argument that “we” need to be at tryouts to make sure that “politics”, or any “wrongdoing” does not take place is ridiculous. The reason people say these things is because they want to be there to watch their player, and to “rate” his or her performance against the group. Essentially they are assuming that they are better evaluators than the ones doing the evaluating. The problem with this is that they are only watching the immediate 5 feet surrounding their player.

5th grader wrote;
This is hockey it is played
at a high pace with full physical contact where kids get hurt that is the
facts. Head first into the boards when tripped by your son because he
got beat says it all as to why you wish to not see. Associations do not
even have a Emt at the tryouts think about that. I will be at the tryouts
to see the safety of my child.
This is another of my favorite “reasons” that people need to attend tryouts. The other is the “I only have so much time to spend with my child, and to watch him skate. It really bugs me that they close tryouts and take that opportunity away” Both of these are poorly veiled excuses to be there for tryouts so they can, (see above) do a little more evaluating. After two weeks go by, and the kids are placed on teams, these people will think nothing of dropping their player off at the curb before practice, and picking them up after. Apparently after tryouts have concluded, there is no need to fear for the safety any longer, and the time we “miss” with them can come at a later time.
Our association did a survey of the kids when they first closed tryouts (many years ago), and the kids unanimously approved of the idea. The only drawback, “the car ride home is full of questions”.
Good luck to all players and parents over the next couple weeks!!

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:54 pm
by muckandgrind
netminder.net wrote:muckandgrind wrote;
If the parents would have been banned from watching, nodoby would have noticed and this type of stuff would have been allowed to continue.
If this is really the way it happened, I would be surprised. It seems as though this information would have come out after tryouts, probably with the same repercussions. The argument that “we” need to be at tryouts to make sure that “politics”, or any “wrongdoing” does not take place is ridiculous. The reason people say these things is because they want to be there to watch their player, and to “rate” his or her performance against the group. Essentially they are assuming that they are better evaluators than the ones doing the evaluating. The problem with this is that they are only watching the immediate 5 feet surrounding their player.

5th grader wrote;
This is hockey it is played
at a high pace with full physical contact where kids get hurt that is the
facts. Head first into the boards when tripped by your son because he
got beat says it all as to why you wish to not see. Associations do not
even have a Emt at the tryouts think about that. I will be at the tryouts
to see the safety of my child.
This is another of my favorite “reasons” that people need to attend tryouts. The other is the “I only have so much time to spend with my child, and to watch him skate. It really bugs me that they close tryouts and take that opportunity away” Both of these are poorly veiled excuses to be there for tryouts so they can, (see above) do a little more evaluating. After two weeks go by, and the kids are placed on teams, these people will think nothing of dropping their player off at the curb before practice, and picking them up after. Apparently after tryouts have concluded, there is no need to fear for the safety any longer, and the time we “miss” with them can come at a later time.
Our association did a survey of the kids when they first closed tryouts (many years ago), and the kids unanimously approved of the idea. The only drawback, “the car ride home is full of questions”.
Good luck to all players and parents over the next couple weeks!!
Over generalize much????

You can doubt what happened all you like...but that's the way it went down.

I get really tired of people who claim that the problem is all with the parents and the associations can do no wrong. It's so easy to point the finger at a parent and label them with stereotypes. But you know, not every association is squeaky clean in the way they run things, and people need to pay attention to what is going on.

Again, enough with secrecy. Keep things out in the open. What are people afraid of? You say the kids "unanimously approved of the idea" of closed tryouts. Really? Did you have the kids vote on it? Cast ballots, did you? I doubt it.

Listen, I've been involved with youth hockey for a long time. I've served on boards and have been involved with evaluation processes. There is not a single valid reason for shutting the parents out of the process. Sure, parents can be annoying sometimes, but when you take on the responsibility of running the tryouts, you have to expect to deal with them. If it bothers you, don't volunteer. Simple as that. Secrecy doesn't serve anyone's best interests.

Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 1:27 pm
by 5thgraders
Muckandgind secrecy serves Nutminder.net if the parents show up
they will see that his kid can't stop a puck and they will know before
it is too late that he joined the board of the association to see that
his kid could be on the A team. Sad but true. Closed tryouts is beyond
ludicrous. Dirty games can be played behind closed doors. I know that
is why Nutminder.net likes it so much. [-X

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 7:54 am
by netminder.net
muckandgrind wrote;
If the parents would have been banned from watching, nodoby would have noticed and this type of stuff would have been allowed to continue.
You can doubt what happened all you like...but that's the way it went down.
So what you are saying is that a player was placed on the A team, a more deserving kid was removed, just because they needed a coach. An evaluator, who was “not happy” about the situation, informed you directly. And this problem was only solved because tryouts were open to the public? All I said is it seems this problem would have come to light whether mom and dad were at the tryouts or not. If indeed the reason that this conspiracy was “busted” because you were allowed to watch tryouts, I stand corrected.
muckandgrind asked;
You say the kids "unanimously approved of the idea" of closed tryouts. Really? Did you have the kids vote on it? Cast ballots, did you? I doubt it.
YES!! They did indeed ask every one of the participants. Unanomous is probably to strong, but it was at least 95%. And, No, I did not vote. Why would I, it is not MY tryout

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 7:56 am
by netminder.net
5thgraders wrote;
blah, blah, blah.............................

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 9:21 am
by muckandgrind
netminder.net wrote:muckandgrind wrote;
If the parents would have been banned from watching, nodoby would have noticed and this type of stuff would have been allowed to continue.
You can doubt what happened all you like...but that's the way it went down.
So what you are saying is that a player was placed on the A team, a more deserving kid was removed, just because they needed a coach. An evaluator, who was “not happy” about the situation, informed you directly. And this problem was only solved because tryouts were open to the public? All I said is it seems this problem would have come to light whether mom and dad were at the tryouts or not. If indeed the reason that this conspiracy was “busted” because you were allowed to watch tryouts, I stand corrected.
muckandgrind asked;
You say the kids "unanimously approved of the idea" of closed tryouts. Really? Did you have the kids vote on it? Cast ballots, did you? I doubt it.
YES!! They did indeed ask every one of the participants. Unanomous is probably to strong, but it was at least 95%. And, No, I did not vote. Why would I, it is not MY tryout
I didn't ask if you, personally, cast a ballot...just asking if their were ballots cast. "You" was referring to the organization. And I'm sorry, I have a hard time believing that you handed out hundreds of ballots to kids and had them vote on it. I may have been born at night, but not last night. You couldn't get hundreds of kids (or parents) to agree on anything near a unanamous vote. My bet is that you asked a few kids leading questions to get the response that you wanted to hear.

You still haven't answered the question...what is there to hide? Why be so secretive? Is there anything wrong with a parent wanting to watch their kids skate during the tryouts? There doesn't NEED to be any other reason than we are their parents, we are paying for the icetime, and we would like to see how they perform. It's pretty simple, really. And before you respond with the cliche "it's about the kids, not about the parents" response. Let me remind you that those are OUR kids, not your's. It's not your responsibility to tell me what is right for my child. I'll decide that. (I know for a fact that my kids like to have me watch, just as I liked to my dad to watch my tryouts when I was a player) And if tryouts are to be closed, it should be a board decision voted on during a board meeting, with the association membership (parents) being allowed to voice their opinion.

The only people that I know of who are in favor of closing the tryouts are a few spineless tryout coordinators who are afraid to deal with a few angry parents. But you know what? That comes with the job. Grow a pair and tell the parents to buzz off if they are angry about what team their kid was put on. Better yet, explain to them the process of HOW kids are placed on teams, whether that be through independent evaluators, coaches, or a combination of both. 99% of parents won't say anything anyways. They just want to watch their kids skate. All the coordinator needs to do is lay down a few simple rules: (1) Don't approach the evaluators, (2) Be quiet, no cheering and (3) If you have a problem or concern, take it up with the coordinator 24 hours after the tryouts end(the "cool down period rule").

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 9:26 am
by tomASS
no one is suggesting banning parents or preventing them from attending.

That was another topic entirely.

The suggestion was, IMO, that that I think kids are better off without their parents there. I can see the medical concern but leave your cell number in case something happens. You will be there quicker than most EMT's response time.

When you think there is a vail of secrecy especially at this level it might be more than an association problem.

Good Luck to the Kids

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 10:04 am
by nahc
MuckandGrind:

Absolutley agree wholeheartedly!!!!!!!!!