Moderators: Mitch Hawker, east hockey, karl(east)
dumbJSR wrote:I agree that occurs but there are plenty of parents who I have seen who do care even when it's not their son involved. In fact I have seen a parent stand up to a coach regarding short benching when their kid was the one getting the most playing time and extra shifts. So that is not an "absolute" ruleandovercw wrote:It has been my observation that a short bench is ok until it is your own kid that is on the bench. I've seen mothers crying and screaming one year and all smiles the next. They didn't care one bit about the other kids and their parents who just got shorted.
Not even remotely dumb... read on through the thread to see the reasoning behind it.. Pretty smart if you ask meRef22 wrote:dumbJSR wrote:I agree that occurs but there are plenty of parents who I have seen who do care even when it's not their son involved. In fact I have seen a parent stand up to a coach regarding short benching when their kid was the one getting the most playing time and extra shifts. So that is not an "absolute" ruleandovercw wrote:It has been my observation that a short bench is ok until it is your own kid that is on the bench. I've seen mothers crying and screaming one year and all smiles the next. They didn't care one bit about the other kids and their parents who just got shorted.
Dumb in the sense that she shouldn't be the one confronting the coach. Parents should keep their distance in youth sports.JSR wrote:Not even remotely dumb... read on through the thread to see the reasoning behind it.. Pretty smart if you ask meRef22 wrote:dumbJSR wrote: I agree that occurs but there are plenty of parents who I have seen who do care even when it's not their son involved. In fact I have seen a parent stand up to a coach regarding short benching when their kid was the one getting the most playing time and extra shifts. So that is not an "absolute" rule
Alright, first off it was a "dad" not a "mom", so he not she, again if you had read the thread you would know thatRef22 wrote:Dumb in the sense that she shouldn't be the one confronting the coach. Parents should keep their distance in youth sports.JSR wrote:Not even remotely dumb... read on through the thread to see the reasoning behind it.. Pretty smart if you ask meRef22 wrote:dumb
JSR wrote:Alright, first off it was a "dad" not a "mom", so he not she, again if you had read the thread you would know thatRef22 wrote:Dumb in the sense that she shouldn't be the one confronting the coach. Parents should keep their distance in youth sports.JSR wrote: Not even remotely dumb... read on through the thread to see the reasoning behind it.. Pretty smart if you ask me
Who should do it when something is blatantly wrong??? I am a high level soccer coach and I also coach association level hockey (I played soccer at a D1 level and played hockey through high school) so my thought process is a little different than most parents and my conversations with coaches are usually alot different than most parents have with a coach. But I have never had a problem with a parent telling me their thoughts or opinions provided they are rational, logical, well thought out and respectful. Not sure why any coach would ever have an issue if done that way??? If they are disrespectful or out of control that is wrong but I don't think parents should just "shut up" though either. I am privvy to the circumstances that lead up to this parent talking to this coach and it was the right thing to do, and if you were there I would be astounded if thought otherwise as well. If a kid is a Bantam then the kid should be the one speaking up for themselves but a 10 or 11 year old or younger, no way, no how, that is a parents job at those young ages and not everything a coach does is "right", that really is the crux of this whole thread though, isn't it???.......
The kid in this instance was an 11 year old pee wee, and to me the parent was not complainig they were in fact right on the money in their assessment.... also your response now doesn't even make sense, did you read carefully, in this instance the kid is the hardest working, best player on the team, he is getting extra shifts, double shifts and way too long shifts and it was causing bad habits but it was because he was jsut doing as the coach asked, how is an 11 year old supposed to udnerstand how to have that conversation???.... is it still "dumb"Ref22 wrote:JSR wrote:Alright, first off it was a "dad" not a "mom", so he not she, again if you had read the thread you would know thatRef22 wrote: Dumb in the sense that she shouldn't be the one confronting the coach. Parents should keep their distance in youth sports.
Who should do it when something is blatantly wrong??? I am a high level soccer coach and I also coach association level hockey (I played soccer at a D1 level and played hockey through high school) so my thought process is a little different than most parents and my conversations with coaches are usually alot different than most parents have with a coach. But I have never had a problem with a parent telling me their thoughts or opinions provided they are rational, logical, well thought out and respectful. Not sure why any coach would ever have an issue if done that way??? If they are disrespectful or out of control that is wrong but I don't think parents should just "shut up" though either. I am privvy to the circumstances that lead up to this parent talking to this coach and it was the right thing to do, and if you were there I would be astounded if thought otherwise as well. If a kid is a Bantam then the kid should be the one speaking up for themselves but a 10 or 11 year old or younger, no way, no how, that is a parents job at those young ages and not everything a coach does is "right", that really is the crux of this whole thread though, isn't it???.......
I also coach and played at a high level (not soccer) and it's my opinion once the kids get to be a teen he should be the one having discussions with coaches about his playing time. Nothing more embarrassing than a kid finding out his parents have been complaining about playing time to his coach.
Couldn't agree more with you. That is how I raise my kids, if they want to get better, or get more playing time etc... I always tell them "go talk to your coach, if your coach is a good coach they will love that YOU came to them", however that is not the scenario Ref22 and I are discussing right nowold goalie85 wrote:I agree that you let the kid do the talking. [12 and up] I don't want to take the experience of dealing w/the coach themselves away from my kids. Isn't that why we put our children into sports ?? Growing as people. Maybe the coach will look little Jonnie/Suzzie in the eye and say "your not playing because you don't work hard" . Would that be bad ?? Could end up being the best thing that ever happened to the kid.
Yes it is. I haven't read the whole thread though you are right. I will read it though. Some reason I thought it was a mom that confronted the coach publicly. my bad.JSR wrote:Couldn't agree more with you. That is how I raise my kids, if they want to get better, or get more playing time etc... I always tell them "go talk to your coach, if your coach is a good coach they will love that YOU came to them", however that is not the scenario Ref22 and I are discussing right nowold goalie85 wrote:I agree that you let the kid do the talking. [12 and up] I don't want to take the experience of dealing w/the coach themselves away from my kids. Isn't that why we put our children into sports ?? Growing as people. Maybe the coach will look little Jonnie/Suzzie in the eye and say "your not playing because you don't work hard" . Would that be bad ?? Could end up being the best thing that ever happened to the kid.
That's going to be a penalty call on Ref22 resulting in a 2 and 10 for obstruction of reason. You have just confirmed the short bench is on every level and your arm is still raised resulting in the goalie leaving for the bench while a goal is scored. Now parents are storming the bench and we have total mayhem. Was the short bench discussion worth $25? The short bench system goes through many levels of hockey.Ref22 wrote:Typical parents shouldn't be coaches at the Peewee B level or higher.Ugottobekiddingme wrote:Kid: Da coach...why am I sitting the full third period after scoring two goals?
Coach: Shut up and watch my kid skate.
Kid: Thanks for your leadership coach.
Cynical runs deep with this one.Ugottobekiddingme wrote:Kid: Da coach...why am I sitting the full third period after scoring two goals?
Coach: Shut up and watch my kid skate.
Kid: Thanks for your leadership coach.
I don't know, most all of my experiences with short benches aren't that far off from that. No 100% of the time but a significant majority. I haev experienced it having been done well a few times but the majority are not doen well, aren't communicated with the players and often the players on the ice are not better than the ones sitting but do seem to be "coaches son", "coaches buddy's son" etc... etc....bestpopcorn wrote:Cynical runs deep with this one.Ugottobekiddingme wrote:Kid: Da coach...why am I sitting the full third period after scoring two goals?
Coach: Shut up and watch my kid skate.
Kid: Thanks for your leadership coach.
Must have had VERY bad experience.
I think he paints with a brush that might be a bit to broad.
bestpopcorn wrote:Cynical runs deep with this one.Ugottobekiddingme wrote:Kid: Da coach...why am I sitting the full third period after scoring two goals?
Coach: Shut up and watch my kid skate.
Kid: Thanks for your leadership coach.
Must have had VERY bad experience.
I think he paints with a brush that might be a bit to broad.
Apparently in never never land all is well but here in boredville it appears to be an issue - hence the 6 pages of discussion.Nevertoomuchhockey wrote:Great teams and great coaches have already talked about PP PK lines and rotation and SHORT BENCH SITUATIONS off the ice, way before it comes into play. Shouldn't come as a surprise to any player or parent.
Only coach I've met that has my total and complete respect without reservation is my daughters soccer coach. Best coach I have ever met in any sport ever, hands down. Has very high expectations of his players, explains his plan to the parents, explains what he does to his players and why he does it, gets the most out of every layer on his roster and stays with his teams for three consecutive years before he releases them to a new coach because he believes he cannot teach his teams and his players how to play the game in less time than that. He has the skills to show what he wants at the very highest level (former EPL player), he's only 30 but he has a passion for coaching and teaching liek nothing i have ever seen and the kids jsut love him and fall in love with the game because of him and every single team he has ever had, no matter how "bad" they were when he got them has grown to one of the very best teams in not just the state but the midwest, be it boys or girls, and they are all kids from our little tiny town, it's actually quite remarkable I'd say it is sort of like the soccer version of Roseau hockey if that makes sense.Nevertoomuchhockey wrote:Yeah reading this thread makes me grateful. My kid always knows where he stands, what his coaches want, and when he will see his minutes. And one of those coaches is a SHE.
Man, that explains just about everything.JSR wrote:Only coach I've met that has my total and complete respect without reservation is my daughters soccer coach. Best coach I have ever met in any sport ever, hands down. Has very high expectations of his players, explains his plan to the parents, explains what he does to his players and why he does it, gets the most out of every layer on his roster and stays with his teams for three consecutive years before he releases them to a new coach because he believes he cannot teach his teams and his players how to play the game in less time than that. He has the skills to show what he wants at the very highest level (former EPL player), he's only 30 but he has a passion for coaching and teaching liek nothing i have ever seen and the kids jsut love him and fall in love with the game because of him and every single team he has ever had, no matter how "bad" they were when he got them has grown to one of the very best teams in not just the state but the midwest, be it boys or girls, and they are all kids from our little tiny town, it's actually quite remarkable I'd say it is sort of like the soccer version of Roseau hockey if that makes sense.Nevertoomuchhockey wrote:Yeah reading this thread makes me grateful. My kid always knows where he stands, what his coaches want, and when he will see his minutes. And one of those coaches is a SHE.
Nevertoomuchposting.....If you like your short bench, you can keep your short bench. If you like your coach, well he/she might not be around next year.Nevertoomuchhockey wrote:Great teams and great coaches have already talked about PP PK lines and rotation and SHORT BENCH SITUATIONS off the ice, way before it comes into play. Shouldn't come as a surprise to any player or parent.
I should clarify that I had great respect for some of my coaches growing up but they don't coach anymore to my knowledge. Hard finding that breed now a daysSECoach wrote:Man, that explains just about everything.JSR wrote:Only coach I've met that has my total and complete respect without reservation is my daughters soccer coach. Best coach I have ever met in any sport ever, hands down. Has very high expectations of his players, explains his plan to the parents, explains what he does to his players and why he does it, gets the most out of every layer on his roster and stays with his teams for three consecutive years before he releases them to a new coach because he believes he cannot teach his teams and his players how to play the game in less time than that. He has the skills to show what he wants at the very highest level (former EPL player), he's only 30 but he has a passion for coaching and teaching liek nothing i have ever seen and the kids jsut love him and fall in love with the game because of him and every single team he has ever had, no matter how "bad" they were when he got them has grown to one of the very best teams in not just the state but the midwest, be it boys or girls, and they are all kids from our little tiny town, it's actually quite remarkable I'd say it is sort of like the soccer version of Roseau hockey if that makes sense.Nevertoomuchhockey wrote:Yeah reading this thread makes me grateful. My kid always knows where he stands, what his coaches want, and when he will see his minutes. And one of those coaches is a SHE.